Bristol Post reporting naked cyclists, neo-nazis and anti-fascists to meet in College Green.  If all goes well, the neo-nazis will compare tattoos and scars with the cyclists and the anti-fascists will vote on the best tattoo and best scar.

The LAist reports that a hit and run driver who fled the scene in her BMW is finally arrested.  The suspect attempted to alter her appearance by dying her hair bright pink and adding a tribal face tattoo to her left cheek.  Eyewitness photos and tips to the police led to her arrest in late May.   Apparently, she did not read the Crime for Dummies section on Evading arrest thoroughly.  It clearly states only plastic surgery works as a good disguise along with an average look and sub compact car.  Dying your hair an eye catching neon color, getting a unique tattoo and driving a flashy beemer are not good choices to avoid arrest.

The Courier Post reports man sued for $30k over $40 printer he sold on line.  The newest thing in entrepreneurship, you too can earn hundreds, even thousands, filing lawsuits over products you don’t like, or received in broken condition.  Cheap products recommended compensating for your frequent bus travel to court house to file papers.  It’s best to begin with small sums, in hundreds and work your way up to hundreds of thousands, for mental distress and deceptive advertising.  This business only recommended for people who love the inside of a courtroom, have lots of storage space for paperwork and hang on like a dog with a bone.

The Telegraph reports an unusual robbery in India, by a monkey.  A master of deception, the monkey accepted half a banana from the owner to stay out of the store.  When the owner got back to business, the monkey tossed the banana aside, entering the store once again.  Armed with only his mouth and hands, the monkey quickly located the cash drawer, grabbed 10,000 rupees, stashed them in his mouth and fled up the street.  After making his swift getaway, the monkey stopped to purchase a basket of mangoes from the local fruit guy.   Residents are asked to be on the lookout for a monkey with a mango hangover flinging a few rupees around.   Approach with caution and under no circumstances offer him any banana.


About kriskkaria

Hi, I'm Kris. A narrator, actor, voice actor, and writer. I've impersonated a cat, a prince, a princess, a witch, a madwoman, and a president with my voice and narrated/produced over 40 audiobooks. I narrate and produce an award-winning weekly storytelling podcast showcasing stories from fantastic writers. Visit my IMDB page for stage and screen credits.

2 responses »

  1. ksbeth says:

    monkey crime rates have gotten out of control – when will it ever end!?

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