My thoughts on the latest news this week and another scammer encounter.

Liquid ASS released by dumb ass.   Yes, a bar in Athens, Georgia cleared by a patron with a bottle of liquid ASS, a prank product.  This product smells like shit and the little shit who released it was underage and drunk.  Police dragged his ass and Liquid ASS off to jail.

I received a message from an exceptionally dumb scammer this week through a new social site, BeBee.  This dude sent a message saying he was from California didn’t address it to me personally and told me he wanted to speak about important business.  His message insisted I email him directly to his personal email address in order to conduct business.  When I went to his profile, it said he was from Abu Dubayy, UAE.  That’s a long way from California.  I sent him a nice message back, reminding him his profile said he was from UAE and what was so important.   He sent another message back telling me he’s fine and please email him at his yahoo address.  Yeah, great, now they’ve automated scammer mail.

A pizza box invented by NYC guy breaks into a weed pipe, just peel and smoke.  It’s solving two problems at once, a way to smoke weed and have your munchies on hand.  Depending on how soon after smoking the munchies set in, the pizza might be a little cold.   If this weed legalization catches on in more states, maybe Dominos will deliver your pizza in its own mobile warming unit to keep it toasty while you smoke.

In South Carolina, if you join the New Spring Church, you receive a guarantee, just like on TV.  If not satisfied with your salvation and changes in your life within 90 days, you’re free to return it.  Your salvation, that is.  You can keep the T-shirt.  And you will receive a free set of knives, but doesn’t mention whether they’re Ginsu or not.

And to round out this week in the news, there is a guy who wants to marry his MAC, in Texas. He insists on overturning the legalization of same sex marriage.  I don’t get it.  My guy has been married to his MAC for years, and he’s cheating on the side with his iPad now.  He spends more time hugging them than me.  The guy in Texas asks if we’re delusional.  Yes, he’s behind the times, most people are already married to their smart phone, laptop or tablet.

About kriskkaria

Hi, I'm Kris. A narrator, actor, voice actor, and writer. I've impersonated a cat, a prince, a princess, a witch, a madwoman, and a president with my voice and narrated/produced over 40 audiobooks. I narrate and produce an award-winning weekly storytelling podcast showcasing stories from fantastic writers. Visit my IMDB page for stage and screen credits.

2 responses »

  1. ksbeth says:

    i believe that my i-phone would stand up for me at a mac ceremony.

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