They think I’m a stripper, I finally realized.  I walked into a party of yuppie motorcyclists to perform a comic roast of the birthday boy.  I received the cold shoulder from the guests the moment I walked in, which is unusual.  It didn’t help the geek who booked me insisted on an introduction not in sync with my schtick.  Halfway through my roast, the guests still looked confused so I took off my jacket to dance.  Everyone held their breath and one parent yelled “don’t let the kids see”.  But, that’s all I did, then I danced around to the music in my t-shirt.  The crowd warmed up as I danced.  Here’s the link to my costume,   A stripper, really?  What do you think?

I often perform singing telegrams, comic roasts and the occasional celebrity impersonation for special occasions, like milestone birthdays and anniversaries.  I did a lot more performances when the economy didn’t stink like it does now.  It’s always fun and rewarding, except when the party planner misjudges the recipient’s embarrassment tolerance or doesn’t get buy in from all the appropriate family members.

A friend of mine arrived at a 30th birthday party as Nurse Mary Shots.  It’s a singing telegram with sight gags about getting older.  The birthday boy looked a little uptight when Kim walked in but sometimes they loosen up once you get going.  Kim got through the introduction and slipped on her latex gloves.  The birthday boy jumped up raced down the stairs and out of the house.  His buddies followed him.  Kim chased after this gaggle of men, the procession spilling out of the sidewalk and into the street.  She gave up rather than chase the men down the street.  The hostess and all her female friends, the only ones left in the house, told her it’s the birthday boy’s loss and tipped her anyway.


About kriskkaria

Hi, I'm Kris. A narrator, actor, voice actor, and writer. I've impersonated a cat, a prince, a princess, a witch, a madwoman, and a president with my voice and narrated/produced over 40 audiobooks. I narrate and produce an award-winning weekly storytelling podcast showcasing stories from fantastic writers. Visit my IMDB page for stage and screen credits.

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